Did it start as love?
Whatever it was once,
It ended as some
stockholm syndrome.
You are the problem now,
the seconds in the morning
between sleep and waking.
when its over,
i still wonder who i am.
On one of our last days
when the shackles were tight
but i had found the keys
you said to me
"this was the kiss,
but you shifted.
this was your chance but
you missed it."
Did it start as love?
In any case,
i'm better now
disoriented
and indifferent.
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Monday, June 28, 2010
Breakdown Near The Met.
My brain jumped on the next train to stay sane;
But my eyes, all graffiti and flecks of light,
Stuck to the pavement, the fly paper.
Why was the sky all blue and grey today;
And the silly jump rope kids complained
Pulled on their A-shirts, their sweaty flesh.
My hollow canals felt the rush, the surge and flush;
All the silly jump rope kids complained
When they called the ambulance, no one came.
But my eyes, all graffiti and flecks of light,
Stuck to the pavement, the fly paper.
Why was the sky all blue and grey today;
And the silly jump rope kids complained
Pulled on their A-shirts, their sweaty flesh.
My hollow canals felt the rush, the surge and flush;
All the silly jump rope kids complained
When they called the ambulance, no one came.
Electronic Harmony
He took me to dinner.
Some french place that wouldn't serve me a beer.
"We only have wine, and all of it's clear."
He told me about his hairplugs.
he wanted me to run my fingers through it.
After, i washed them until they were prunes.
We fucked against a hand dryer
And he drove me home in a rusted car
with a hole in the floor on the passanger side.
I saw him the next night
and sighed over his financial advice,
watched his tie struggle against rolls of skin.
But when i took my high heels off
he laughed at how tall i was still.
That was when i sent him home, all that it took.
I'll wait again for the next computer generated match
and tap my fingers against my water glass
listening to the beat of some sort of battery operated heart.
Some french place that wouldn't serve me a beer.
"We only have wine, and all of it's clear."
He told me about his hairplugs.
he wanted me to run my fingers through it.
After, i washed them until they were prunes.
We fucked against a hand dryer
And he drove me home in a rusted car
with a hole in the floor on the passanger side.
I saw him the next night
and sighed over his financial advice,
watched his tie struggle against rolls of skin.
But when i took my high heels off
he laughed at how tall i was still.
That was when i sent him home, all that it took.
I'll wait again for the next computer generated match
and tap my fingers against my water glass
listening to the beat of some sort of battery operated heart.
The Backwash
She made me afraid to eat apples,
I always think, Who will be there
after the first bite, and will i turn around
and find that all my choices, even the good ones
were for naught.
So I smoke cigarettes, and have sex with people
I don't even like, narcotize myself through cheap
thrills and finish the bottles in the morning.
I'm a week late, and botched another change;
But I never eat apples.
I would hate to think it was too late.
I always think, Who will be there
after the first bite, and will i turn around
and find that all my choices, even the good ones
were for naught.
So I smoke cigarettes, and have sex with people
I don't even like, narcotize myself through cheap
thrills and finish the bottles in the morning.
I'm a week late, and botched another change;
But I never eat apples.
I would hate to think it was too late.
Do As I Say But...
I pissed in a shoebox and the toilet
was ten feet away.
"I just couldn't hold it."
The next morning i spanked my son
when he shit in his crib
then i went to throw up
in the garbage.
was ten feet away.
"I just couldn't hold it."
The next morning i spanked my son
when he shit in his crib
then i went to throw up
in the garbage.
Not In Memoriam
He misses you, and wants to know you're well.
Wonders if you steal time when it's free.
fathoms you trying to make collect calls
from a payphone with no dial tone. thinks maybe
you still wretch over television
and cry during dog food commercials.
wants to know if you still believe you're
invincible, now that you can't touch down,
hopes that you walk on clouds.
There is silence at home
And he wants you to know.
Wonders if you steal time when it's free.
fathoms you trying to make collect calls
from a payphone with no dial tone. thinks maybe
you still wretch over television
and cry during dog food commercials.
wants to know if you still believe you're
invincible, now that you can't touch down,
hopes that you walk on clouds.
There is silence at home
And he wants you to know.
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
The Piano
Black keys.
All encompassing black keys,
Something out of another universe
Won't you help me.
Give up to surrender
All of the things ive never done,
Never played the black keys,
All encompassing black keys.
Paralytic,
The mind, my mind,
Wheelchair bound crippled,
Bone dry.
Idioms are swallowed up.
Delve into what you can afford to lose
And watch you lose yourself.
Maybe play the black keys.
All encompassing black keys.
All encompassing black keys,
Something out of another universe
Won't you help me.
Give up to surrender
All of the things ive never done,
Never played the black keys,
All encompassing black keys.
Paralytic,
The mind, my mind,
Wheelchair bound crippled,
Bone dry.
Idioms are swallowed up.
Delve into what you can afford to lose
And watch you lose yourself.
Maybe play the black keys.
All encompassing black keys.
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
The Moon Shadows
Vaguely lit by the autumn moon
Through Italian villas speared with shine
Flows out love ablaze enchanting as fall
Like Butterflies twining;
He coos and the trees move.
Her shadow follows pulling light and new dew
Their bevy of wild coupling
Making even angels blush
All flowers bloom on this satisfied earth
The sweet brows riddled with brilliance of truth.
They face their realm, their own frontier
This courageous devotion against all worlds blue eyes
Ignoring murmurs of love never lasts
Knowing all of love is forever.
She steps into the rip tide
He saves and the world stays
Their tenderness bronzed against human flies
An always love glazed under horizons sky.
Through Italian villas speared with shine
Flows out love ablaze enchanting as fall
Like Butterflies twining;
He coos and the trees move.
Her shadow follows pulling light and new dew
Their bevy of wild coupling
Making even angels blush
All flowers bloom on this satisfied earth
The sweet brows riddled with brilliance of truth.
They face their realm, their own frontier
This courageous devotion against all worlds blue eyes
Ignoring murmurs of love never lasts
Knowing all of love is forever.
She steps into the rip tide
He saves and the world stays
Their tenderness bronzed against human flies
An always love glazed under horizons sky.
Mary Mallon
Churning the mutinous pot
Under quarentine,
Though never forgot.
Locked in this body
Still serving the wicked that
Always seem to infect;
Withered.
Velvet.
Hanging.
Skin dripping off to syrup-
I find them wretched, when supper's done,
Lungs bubbled up.
They all died, abruptly,
And without cause.
But I knew what made them ill;
And I know still.
The carpenters came in to
Stretch their skin
To lamps and curtains
-Winter hats for the rest of the pack.
Their bones were cut down
Chisled into candle holders
-Ivory doll molds.
Never a thought where to put the hearts
So I served them,
Bloody and cold.
Under quarentine,
Though never forgot.
Locked in this body
Still serving the wicked that
Always seem to infect;
Withered.
Velvet.
Hanging.
Skin dripping off to syrup-
I find them wretched, when supper's done,
Lungs bubbled up.
They all died, abruptly,
And without cause.
But I knew what made them ill;
And I know still.
The carpenters came in to
Stretch their skin
To lamps and curtains
-Winter hats for the rest of the pack.
Their bones were cut down
Chisled into candle holders
-Ivory doll molds.
Never a thought where to put the hearts
So I served them,
Bloody and cold.
Monday, June 14, 2010
Though She'll Feel Nothing
Here is my vessel,
At dawn lies the wake-
The shuddering impact,
A long waited quake
Though all of my heart's there...
It's suffering still.
The once been's since gone here
The promise until.
The vessel, so empty,
The heart full of rot,
My creature so lovely
Though loving it not.
For moments of pathos;
In pleasure she cries
"But you're not the one!"
As the orgasm dies.
At dawn lies the wake-
The shuddering impact,
A long waited quake
Though all of my heart's there...
It's suffering still.
The once been's since gone here
The promise until.
The vessel, so empty,
The heart full of rot,
My creature so lovely
Though loving it not.
For moments of pathos;
In pleasure she cries
"But you're not the one!"
As the orgasm dies.
Begotten Souls
Oh, begotten souls!
When will you learn
Love exists not in this capacity;
Real only in your minds farce;
A solitary joke on yourself.
When will you learn
Love exists not in this capacity;
Real only in your minds farce;
A solitary joke on yourself.
Bury Him With His Blue Collar
He wakes too early to watch
The dog run and dew dry.
Bitter coffee and latin music
That picture of his mother.
A mop, a bucket, good knees
Wasted in rush hour traffic.
The winter snapped at his shoulders
'Til his hands fell off.
Veins bulge, too many cigarettes;
He cries with his daughter,
Laughs with his son,
And remembers his mother.
Kharma disproved by a man
Who only loved to water his lawn,
Catch fish with chicken.
He will expire when the lease is up.
No Thanks,
Only crows feet and a smile.
The dog run and dew dry.
Bitter coffee and latin music
That picture of his mother.
A mop, a bucket, good knees
Wasted in rush hour traffic.
The winter snapped at his shoulders
'Til his hands fell off.
Veins bulge, too many cigarettes;
He cries with his daughter,
Laughs with his son,
And remembers his mother.
Kharma disproved by a man
Who only loved to water his lawn,
Catch fish with chicken.
He will expire when the lease is up.
No Thanks,
Only crows feet and a smile.
How Do You Save A Political Agenda?
The dogs in Darfur starving
Master's dying.
Angie saw herself on screen
Tried to save the world.
The U.N. won't touch Korea
They will atom bomb us away.
The children with flies on their face
Eat skin for breakfast.
Mothers with H.I.V. wait
To become never were.
In Darfur the dogs go roaming
Master's never there.
Master's dying.
Angie saw herself on screen
Tried to save the world.
The U.N. won't touch Korea
They will atom bomb us away.
The children with flies on their face
Eat skin for breakfast.
Mothers with H.I.V. wait
To become never were.
In Darfur the dogs go roaming
Master's never there.
Searching For Prideful Fools
Don't save Icarus!
Mafia said sleep with the fishes, does he.
We found feathers on the shore
And swatted at seagulls.
His father weeps in pawn shops
And looks for his body in boys
Flying kites in tangled power lines.
Foolish little boys, don't fly so high!
But these young ones scowl
continuing their wings.
Mafia said sleep with the fishes, does he.
We found feathers on the shore
And swatted at seagulls.
His father weeps in pawn shops
And looks for his body in boys
Flying kites in tangled power lines.
Foolish little boys, don't fly so high!
But these young ones scowl
continuing their wings.
Mahoney's Funeral Parlor Across The Schoolyard
There's an African Proverb.
'When a man dies, a library burns down.'
Somehow unfastened, reminded of the specifics-
-A dowager in stripes, distended with child,
Maureen in her magenta blazer,
The mourners chuckling.
-The middle school across the way,
So many, so much youth
Unsuspecting or already spoiled.
The glue on his lips choked back some vindication.
The gloss, pink cherry smacking
On swollen lips stuck
Forgiveness to the front of the teeth.
Great men die every day.
The world mourns their memories,
Cherished like the words from a book.
Losing him is not even a typo in the words on a page.
'When a man dies, a library burns down.'
Somehow unfastened, reminded of the specifics-
-A dowager in stripes, distended with child,
Maureen in her magenta blazer,
The mourners chuckling.
-The middle school across the way,
So many, so much youth
Unsuspecting or already spoiled.
The glue on his lips choked back some vindication.
The gloss, pink cherry smacking
On swollen lips stuck
Forgiveness to the front of the teeth.
Great men die every day.
The world mourns their memories,
Cherished like the words from a book.
Losing him is not even a typo in the words on a page.
1:28, Realized.
My God!
I sold my Books
To buy the shoes you're wearing.
Feel less candescent,
More translucent-
The longer you're waiting,
Baiting,
Breath thats shady
Pine trees roaming
Through me you feast
And Tick
Tick
Tick
Your fingertips
Say Yes! I'll have another
Please, If I may cry
Or Scream
Or Hope.
Through prayer your blow torch
Singes off my wispy hair-
But should you cry for me now,
What will I look like when you get there?
An empty vase or row of
Unsolicited chairs.
You're supposed to climb
On Top of me to lay?
Legs draped like flowers
Over our grave-
Worship this meaningless pump
Results
Nothing but regret and torment
And
My God!
I sold my books
To buy the shoes you wear
-And I'm the one whose never made love?
I sold my Books
To buy the shoes you're wearing.
Feel less candescent,
More translucent-
The longer you're waiting,
Baiting,
Breath thats shady
Pine trees roaming
Through me you feast
And Tick
Tick
Tick
Your fingertips
Say Yes! I'll have another
Please, If I may cry
Or Scream
Or Hope.
Through prayer your blow torch
Singes off my wispy hair-
But should you cry for me now,
What will I look like when you get there?
An empty vase or row of
Unsolicited chairs.
You're supposed to climb
On Top of me to lay?
Legs draped like flowers
Over our grave-
Worship this meaningless pump
Results
Nothing but regret and torment
And
My God!
I sold my books
To buy the shoes you wear
-And I'm the one whose never made love?
New Feminism
Would you believe the heights of collars those days?
These skateboards with breasts,
Trophies for the phallic sex-
Have opened their mouths
Closed off their entryways.
Our Gentlemen scoff and pat
The hands of women stuffed up
With children and chiffon;
Later, to be choking on his pride,
On her suffering-
-Her sufferage.
They dreamed
Of power-
Oh...did they.
May we confess our womanhood?
We have fought to replace it
With higher heels,
Plunging necklines,
Bigger Breasts,
Pin thick waists...
Here I think equality
Wouldn't you know?
I was getting my nails done
When I forgot to vote.
These skateboards with breasts,
Trophies for the phallic sex-
Have opened their mouths
Closed off their entryways.
Our Gentlemen scoff and pat
The hands of women stuffed up
With children and chiffon;
Later, to be choking on his pride,
On her suffering-
-Her sufferage.
They dreamed
Of power-
Oh...did they.
May we confess our womanhood?
We have fought to replace it
With higher heels,
Plunging necklines,
Bigger Breasts,
Pin thick waists...
Here I think equality
Wouldn't you know?
I was getting my nails done
When I forgot to vote.
A Dedication
Wounds of the flesh heal fast and stop bleeding;
The vessels of the heart can't mend and keep seeping;
The captured mind can't focus,the chemicals still needing;
All scars may fade; but love knows no seceding.
The vessels of the heart can't mend and keep seeping;
The captured mind can't focus,the chemicals still needing;
All scars may fade; but love knows no seceding.
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